I really think you guys should still get married. Not just the fact that it is clearly expensive and not refundable. His dad would want you guys to get married and be happy. I say go for it.My fiance and I are getting married in a week and his father died yesterday. Should we cancel the wedding?
This decision needs to be made primarily by your fiance and his family.
How are your fiance, his mother, and the rest of the groom's side of the family holding up? Was the death unexpected?
Can you discuss this with your future mother-in-law? The one thing that comes to mind if you go ahead with the wedding would be to have a brief, tasteful tribute to your fiance's father as part of the ceremony.
If your fiance's father was happy about the coming marriage, then given your other considerations, I think you can go ahead with the wedding, because your fiance's father would not want to have his death affect his son's and your happiness this way.
I wish you all the best.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I can't tell you what to do, but I know if it was my father who passed away just before the wedding, I would not cancel the wedding.
Further, if I passed away and it was weeks before the wedding of one of my children, I would be devastated if they canceled their wedding because I had passed away.
Living well and living happily should be a tribute to your father, and I think there are many things you can do at the wedding to remember him.
I would say to have the wedding. Death is a part of life, as is getting married, having a baby, buying a car, etc...
The fact that the wedding is a family and joyous event will surely give everyone a much needed break from the grief. Sure people will still be grieving and some will be crying; but I don't think his father would want the whole wedding to stop because he moved on to a different level of existence. I can imagine that his father will definately be there in spirit.
I am sorry for your fiancé’s loss. This is a very delicate matter that I feel you should consult with your fiancé and his family on. People mourn in different ways. Some feel death shouldn’t be a sad thing – but a celebration of life. Others may need some time and space to let the dust settle before feeling up for a wedding. I think the most gracious thing you can do is speak with your fiancé and his mother or other family members. Would they like some time to grieve? Are they comfortable attending a wedding so soon after such a tragedy?
It’s sweet that you are concerned about the impact of cancellation on your guests. As soon as you know how your fiancé and his family feel about proceeding as planned or cancelling the wedding – get that information out to your guests. Because this is such a delicate matter, I’d recommend you make phone calls to touch base. If your guest list is large, ask your bridal party to help.
Best of luck.
No, I am sure he would not want you to cancel. I would do something to honor him at the wedding.
My husband and I did that at our wedding, because his mother had passed.
I walked with an extra white rose with my bouquet and placed it by her picture and a candle set. It was lovely and people appreciated the gesture.
I am sure his father would not want you to go into debt paying for a second wedding because you cancelled this once
I wouldn't cancel it, I don't think he would have wanted you to have to do that. Just mention his passing at some point and that he will always be in your heart. Then celebrate your wedding and the life that he had.
Not every culture grieves like I find mine does (white, North American). Many cultures have a funeral for the person who passed then have a celebration to celebrate their life. People dance, drink and eat to show that the person who passed was loved and had a good life. I really don't think his father would have wanted you guys to put your wedding on hold because something happened to him.
Of course talk it over with your fiance.
Most likely his father wouldn't have wanted you to cancel everything. I would still go ahead with the plans. Maybe the whole mood of the day will be lower and quieter, and you may not want to be big and splashy, but it's still okay to go through with it. It will probably be a bittersweet day, but you'll make it through. Good luck!! :)
of course you should still have it, if your fiance is emotionally stable enough to get through it. would his father want to inconvenience all the guests who have already made travel plans if he were alive? no. would he want you to lose $$$$ on the deposits you've already paid? no. as long as your wedding doesn't coincide with the funeral, I think it should still go off. but like I said, if no one on his side of the family can hold it together and at least try to be happy on your wedding day, you may have to reschedule. like if it was a sudden death as opposed to a long illness.
Is your fiance in such an emotional state that he cannot enjoy the moment of getting married? If yes, then saying the vows wouldnt be a happy memory for the two of you.
Of course he will still be grieving, but if he can say the vows then I think you should go through with it! It might be a very emotionally draining day. No one is saying that you two have to stay for the whole reception and dance the night away. Do the ceremony, have dinner, a few dances, then slip out. Family members will also be emotional. The important thing is that you got married.
You say ';we'; in your question, so I'm hoping the two of you have already talked about this.
It isn't about the money or tickets. It's about a little ray of hope and happiness for him. It's about a very real fresh start to life for him. He'll need it. You'll need it. Go get married.
And remember, toast his father at the reception, and maybe the officiant can remember him before the service.
I would go on with it. Perhaps you can have a moment at the reception where you say something about him, if that wouldn't be too hard for everyone..
I just think of it in terms of whether I died. I wouldn't want my death to cost my child all that, I'd want them to continue with their wedding and have a good life without that extra burden of a lot of wasted money and no wedding.. I don't know his father, of course, so I can't say for sure what he'd think.. but that's how I'd feel about it. I think the best course of action is to get together with his family and discuss how they'd fare with it %26amp; whether YOU want your wedding to be during such a time.
I think it is up to your fiance and his family. How they are coping with the loss, if they feel like celebrating a wedding in their tough time. If they are able to move on and be there for your day then by all means go with it. You may think about making a tribute to his father at your wedding if you choose to go on with the wedding.
Ask his mother and other close relatives, like his siblings how they feel.
When my parents got married in the 1970s my father's MOTHER died AND his brother's 5 year old CHILD died. Both died 2 weeks before the wedding.
Everyone knew my grandmother had been sick for a long time. So people were ok with wedding going on. But when the 5 year old died my parents didnt know if they should post pone it. So my dad went to his brother and asked him how he felt.
My uncle told my dad that they should continue the wedding as planned because it would give them something happy and positive to look forward to and enjoy.
the wedding was performed as scheduled.
I think his father would want you to still get married. A friend of mine had a wedding a while back and her mom and dad were past, and she put memory seat with a in memory of card with their names and a single red rose placed in the seats where they would be seated, and the same thing at the reception. Sorry for your loss.
this is tough, because i can imagine that even though your fiance is grieving, he would feel forever guilty if he went through all the trouble of postponing the wedding. i would say that you should go through with it. include his fathers death in the service as a celebration of his life. in other words, make your wedding a toast to his life. let the guest know about how much you wished he could have been there, and how he will be included in your thoughts as a couple from now on. also be sure to let your fiance know that you are there for him, and if he feels strongly about postponing the wedding, you'll back him!
good luck, and sorry to your fiance for his loss.
i think you should continue on with it being that your fiance and his family will need an escape. this would be the perfect escape to have some fun and get their minds off of the things that are going.
just know that the wedding will be about the 3 of you. everyone will be talking about the lost father and i think you should even do something like put his picture out on a table as if he may not be there in person but is there in spirit.
my condolences for your loss.
I'm sorry for your loss. How is everything scheduled? Is the funeral and viewings close to the wedding?
Talk to your fiance and your FMIL about it. They may not want to cancel it, but your concern for them would be noted. I'm sure she will feel so happy to know that you would put your day off just to make sure she is okay with it. Good luck.
Soo sorry about ur loss. =( I think u should still have it and just dedicate a song to him in his memory. I know that this is probably a toughy for u but it is also about u and one of the greatest days in ur life. Also since u already paid for it i think it would be a major loss in money.
Again so sorry
dont cancel your wedding he would not have wonted that! how bout filling aload of ballons with heium and and then give everyone some tags and pens to write there own little note to him or a loved one they have lost. tie each note to a ballon and then you can all let them go together a nice way to remeber him i think.
You should continue on with the wedding. He was planning on being there so you know that he will be there no matter what. I am so sorry for your loss but with very point of darkness a ray of light appears and I think that your wedding is just what everybody will need during this hard time.
Sorry for your loss. Keep your wedding plans but it would be nice to add a tribute to his father. Like a special prayer and candle lighting during the ceremony. I am sure that he would want his son to go forward with his wedding.
Just think about it as he would want you to carry on with the wedding he wouldnt want you to lose the money and cancel something just for him. he would want you and his son to be happy :)
No. He would want you to go on with it I am sure. Still have it, too many people will lose money and vacation time. You have to think of the others as well as yourselves in this situation.
You need to discuss this with him and his mother. I'm so sorry this has happened. If you aren't going to cancel, I suggest doing something at the wedding in memory of him. Maybe a slideshow?
It really depends on the Immediate Family and 'both' your feelings but, I'd say No, don't cancel.
Have you wedding. I am sure his father would not have wanted you to cancel it. Plus why waste all the money spent already and not get married.
Sorry about your loss!
i think u shood ask him...if he feels ok with it than go ahead with it and try to keep his father's memory alive by having a great wedding an not letting his passing ruining it like he woodn't have wanted it to.
I would still do it and maybe have something special to honor his father at the wedding.
I wouldn't. His Dad probably wouldn't want you to cancel it. A little happiness might be just the thing.
don't cancel just continue your plans just make her forget for a while n make her very happy.
it should be one of the best days of her life
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